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Hello my fellow Americans.
There are four people in the photo below. One of them is running for mayor of Pittsburgh. Although he won't confirm that. But I'm just goin' way out on a limb and telling you that City Councilman William Peduto, Mr. Peduto-head, will challenge Mayor Opie this spring for the Dem nomination, which, if one wins in the city of Pikksburgh, the city of champs, the city of chumps (having put up with the current Mayor) means you coast onto victory.
Hello Mayor Peduto-head.
If you don't know the players, and you probably don't have a scorecard, Mr. Peduto-head is second from the left. Far left is his top aide. Far right, strangely enough, is your intrepid blogger dogger correspondent. The girlie girl is the lovely and talented Gab, who was emceeing a Children's Museum event, which is where we ran into Mr. Peduto-head, who again, refuses to CONFIRM that he's runnin.'
But he's runnin.' How can I tell fer shersies? The hair. It's the hair.
Somehow Mr. Peduto-head has stolen Mitt Romney's hair. You don't steal the hair of the Mittens if you're not running. Simple.
The back story here is that Mr. PH ran a few years ago, saw that Mayor Opie, Pikksburgh's favorite grandkid, was bound to get way too much of the sympathy vote, having inherited the throne from the dear departed Bobby O, who tragically died of brain cancer. Hence, Mr. PH dropped out.
Pikksburghers were simply too polite to give Opie the heave-ho without giving him a chance. All they were saying was give Ope a chance. They did. He sucked. End of story. No vision. No plan. Snow storm erupts, he hightails it out of town for party time. They didn't give him da heave ho, but Opie found da Ho. And den some.
The other day when the hostage taking freako took over Gateway Center for a few hours, I couldn't help but think of Bobby O'Connor.
Because he would have been there. Right in the thick of things. Shit, he might have even handled the negotiations himself.
And he would have been accused of grandstanding. And the accusers would have been correct. But so what. Bobby was a character and would have been, at the very least, an hysterical Mayor. Bobby would show up, as the old saying goes, at the opening of an envelope.
Opie was nowhere. Opie is nowhere. That's the problem. I don't know if he's making all these nowhere plans for nobody. That would require work.
There was a time when Opie appeared invincible. Word on the street is that polling shows he's not so invincible any more.
I think he's vincible. Opie could be vinced.
So let's watch as Gab waves the checkered flag officially declaring the unofficial start of the Mayor's race.
Now we don't know who else is running, and this will be crucial. City Controller Mike Lamb might be running. And of course former Auditor General Jack Wagner threatens to throw his hat into every damn ring he can find. God knows what other potential spoilers will muck it up for the man who put the head in Peduto-head. Whatever that means.
I don't know if Councilman PH will declare his true intentions until after the Prez election. He is a panelist on the John McIntire Dangerously Live Comedy Talk Show on November 3rd, 10PM, Cabaret Theater. Maybe he'll announce then. Doubtful.
FYI Political Cartoonist Rob Rogers will also take the stage, show and telling his politically incorrect political 'toons. It'll be a hoot. Yinz don't wanna miss it.
Let's hope when the dust settles, Yo Gabba Gabrielle will wave her flag and declare Mr. Peduto-head Da Wiener.
Meantime our Girl Gab is a busy beaver. Awesome comedian though she is, girl can also act. ACTING! Back in the day at Duquesne U., she was one a them thar Red Masquers. Da kids who can act. Having seen the Gabster blow things up in Wonder Of The World, I have witnessed her amazing powers on stage.
Some can't act their way out of a paper bag. Gab can act her way out of a wooden barrel. And this time she's starring in Durang's MEDEA.
So I highly recommend you catch this shiz, as the kids say, Thurs, Fri, Sat 8pm at Duquesne U.
FACEBOOK INVITE FOR GAB IN MEDEA
But dat's not all. Gab and I are co-hosting THE UNION EDGE radio show Thursday 12-3pm Eastern Time on Thursday. If you're reading this Wednesday, dat's 2morrow. When da sun will come up. And stuff. Here is a link to LISTEN LIVE to da show, which I hope in the 1pm hour, will feature San Francisco Political Comedian Will Durst.
LISTEN LIVE TO JOHN AND GAB ON THE UNION EDGE THURS 9/27 NOON-3PM
If you want a flavor of the show, here's an hour that contains some news, but is mostly Gabby and I riffin' on TV Comedy, Teachers' Strikes, The Clintons, and other stuff.
JOHN AND GAB PODCAST FROM THE UNION EDGE
And another thing. Gab appears at the Byam Theater in a Planned Parenthood benefit October 3rd. So check it ott.
COMEDY AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD BENEFIT AT BYAM
One more thing. If you don't want to get all political, and you don't like the radio. come to Da Brillo Box October 16th for Gab's tribute to Hitchcock and Horror, with yours' truly as Alfred.
FACEBOOK INVITE FOR GAB'S HITCHCOCK HORROR COMEDY
OK, dat should do it. So stop living your lives and come to everything we do. That is all at this time.
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